12 o' clock............i forgot the Meridiem

It had to start someday or the other, Ya I was sure of it!! What kept boggling me was what could be the most genuine impulse for this to begin. Was it going to begin with some of those joyous memories gathering out of my days of puerility to post-adolescence at schoolhouse or those from; ofcourse a very few, but those time in life with which all of us desire to stagnate with—those spanned moments of success when I was outstanding a lot of my tribe standing high among jealous and envying from the deepest of their hearts although trying and felicitating……..ohh just leave it.

Some really easy-going people; simple but thoughtful in most truest manner have a view that no Harry can ever be a friend to Sally……

Did a “why” pop ur brain? Then go and watch the movie for the answer…….meanwhile I just have to say that I feel something more general and much more ‘would/could be acceptable’…….amidst the fact that the most accepted are the most debated too.

So as the movie says its untrue for a Harry and a Sally being friends, the sex thing comes in between; I really as I said had a much more generalized thinking to express and that is, “every relation whatever it may be is the worst mistake anyone commits…the SELF thing comes in between”

If you ask me one good reason, I do have one good answer too. Do recall the best ever relation you made; the one person you think you could relate yourself among the best of the best of your relations. Take a pause……..THINK….recall.

I know you do have one…….someone. I know you have an answer. I know you have someone you think you are a relative to and you will tell me that’s not a mistake. ISN’T IT?

A lot of people went through your mind just now……the best of all best!! And in a hurry you successfully compared one against another….and ended over someone whom you did feel was that someone you could bring before me laughing at me telling; “you were not right.”

But what I succeeded in doing now is that you already realised that a lot of relations you just walked over comparing the advantages of your BESTS with shortcomings of the BETTERS; were in one way or the other; mistakes you did make.

That’s what I’m up with. In my short or long whatever run it may be; I did gain from my vicinity that we are all common under a single act; “We choose the best option……be it a thing or a being……….what matters is the SELF, which should win”

I did feel sometimes why thoughts emerged from within me, why did I speak to myself all those time I really needed someone to speak, all those times I compared my relations……..ohh ohh! I mean options.

Among some of those times I decided to note down these talks; but then I feared every time that if I did so I may probably lose the single true person I could talk flawlessly. The things do have a chance to bend from a zone of “no reason” to a desired aim, to be achieved; and I may come to an end “talking to the real me” and gradually compel that hidden, safe and true myself to talk to me whenever I wanted rather than letting him talk whatever he wished to.

So I made a wish; Yes, not a decision but a wish that, “May this all begin without a real cause”, as I too believe that every cause has a definite effect just as every past determines a future.

Amongst all these confusions, I sometimes thought I would start writing some or the other of these themes but if I did so it was again beginning with a cause when suddenly I felt it began that day when I unopened a book where I read stuffs which never saw an end although they seemed to end in words.

The underpage of the same book read, “I can’t speak but my voice resonates in every sip!”

………….So, I guess I have a desire to be that voice.

The moment I say this, I find myself screwed in my own captivity deviating to a purpose as I carefully notice a desire which I always fear but what I am successful still with is; I’m still letting the myself speak whenever he decides.

……………Optimistic? Yes I’m.

but what was this I was writing all this time…………What the hell was it?????